Kissing Doorknobs Paperback - 1999

First line

Step on a crack, break your mother's back!

From the rear cover

When Tara was eleven years old, she heard the phrase that changed her life: step on a crack, break your mother's back. . . . And before Tara knew what was happening, she was counting the cracks in the sidewalk everywhere she went, in constant fear of breaking her mother's back. If she missed one crack or lost count, she had to go home and start all over again.

Over time, Tara's quirks changed -- and multiplied. To calm herself, she arranged her food carefully on the plate, chatted with troll dolls, and recited prayers over and over. She didn't like behaving so oddly; she only knew she had to if she wanted to feel better.

Tara's troubles only got worse when, one day, she developed a new ritual: She kissed her fingers and touched a doorknob. . . .

Terry Spencer Hesser has written a funny, compelling, and sensitive story about a teenage girl afflicted with obsessive-compulsive disorder and the way it affects her relationships with friends and family.

Excerpt

Step on a crack, break your mother's back! The first time I heard that stupid rhyme was when I was eleven years old and still in possession of my own thoughts.

At first I thought the rhyme was stupid.  Step on a crack, break your mother's back! When I couldn't get it out of my head, I thought it was annoying.  Step on a crack, break your mother's back! Finally I thought it was scary.  But no matter what I thought about it, I couldn't stop thinking it.  Actually, it was more as if I couldn't stop hearing it in my head over and over again.

I heard it while I was brushing my teeth,
Step on a crack, break your mother's back!
eating dinner,
Step on a crack, break your mother's back!
doing my homework,
Step on a crack, break your mother's back!
having a conversation,
Step on a crack, break your mother's back!
and falling asleep.

It was like listening to the sound track of a movie that I wasn't watching.  A weird time-release audio torment stuck on Replay in my brain.  Even now, I'm fourteen years old and just thinking about it makes me tap it with my feet.  Step on a crack, break your mother's back!  Nine syllables.  Uneven.  I hate that.

Media reviews

Citations

• Booklist, 01/01/2001, Page 977
• Publishers Weekly, 11/29/1999, Page 73